On my dying bed — an underrated decision-making tool
In my short life, I have seen death in all its glory & sadness. Working at the foremost Nigerian hospital meant I was exposed to so much of it.
The finality of death always makes me wonder — what was this person thinking just before they died? where are they now? do they have peace? but more importantly, what are their regrets?
We have all heard stories of people having specific regrets on their dying bed. In Hollywood, almost every movie with a scene about death has a plot about regret. The themes(of regret) explored are also pretty similar ranging from regret about treating certain people badly, not spending more time with family, not taking that job, not seeing more of the world e.t.c. Many of us can somewhat relate to this and worry about having such regret. This is why I think more people should think about death regularly.
Memento Mori is latin for ‘remember that you have to die’. Death is certain and I believe we should all leverage its certainty to our advantage especially with decision making.
In my line of work, we utilise so many decision-making tools such as the decision matrix, second-order thinking, the Eisenhower matrix etc. These tools are not meant to make decisions for you but tries to help you simplify or standardise the decision-making process. They also help you consider different factors and moves you closer to having clarity of thought needed to make a decision. Going through life, I think we should all have such tools for decision-making and one tool I’d like to propose is a simple question — what would I think of doing/not doing this on my dying bed?
When I left Medicine in 2020, it was front and center in my decision making. I had seen so many people die at this point and I knew life wasn’t certain. I thought to myself, ‘how would I feel on my death bed if I do not pursue a career in digital health’, something I was super interested in(I tend to avoid the word ‘passion’). My answer was ‘deep regret’. This realisation made it very easy for me to pack my bags and move to Lagos, state; Nigeria silicon valley. I have not renewed my medical license since.
Should you call your father? Should you forgive that friend? Should you take a trip to Kenya? Should you talk to that girl? Should you pursue an acting career? Should you swim in the ocean or jump off a plane? One simple thing should guide us…. what would I think of doing/not doing this on my dying bed?
I urge you all to take that leap and be fearless(& unapologetic) in pursuit of whatever sets your soul on fire.
